Maintain Your Lane

If you are wondering, no, this does not literally pertain to driving, traffic, or anything motor-vehicle related, the term is metaphorically used. Maintaining Your Lane in this blog refers to the art of knowing your place with your significant other or people you are dating.

Recently I have been told by a few women that I am not relationship material. When asked how they came to that conclusion, I was told that I 1) date too many women 2) make no mention of monogamy, and 3) am a Player.

In response to these accusations, I am writing about “Maintaining Your Lane”. I have always felt that many people are not good daters. They tend to go out with someone and in the next day or so, that person is labeled as their girlfriend or boyfriend. Usually the relationships are short-lived. I attribute the short lifespan to the fact that both parties did not “shop around” before attempting monogamy.

I am a strong advocate for dating and try to date as much as possible. I never hide the fact that I am dating and leave it up to the females that I ask out as to whether they want to be involved with someone that obviously enjoys the company of multiple women. This in no way means that I never want to be in a monogamous relationship. I am simply surveying my options in an effort to make the best choice for longevity in a relationship. If I have some fun during this process, well, that’s just an added bonus!

When dating multiple women, I find it important that they each be aware of each other and avoid collisions, hence the “Maintain Your Lane” slogan. It is not okay to request that I spend every weekend with you, call you everyday, or not be seen with another female at the same restaurant where we ate at last week. Doing any of these things sets off an annoying sound, that of you hitting the “dummy bumps”, you know, the little bumps that separate the lanes on the highway! There are many indications that you are on the dummy bumps, such as me telling you to stop whining, me asking you to respect my time with others, etc. Once an indication has been received that you are on the dummy bumps, the appropriate actions are to either correct the situation and ease back into your lane, or get off the road! When each party maintains their lane, the dating ride can be a safe and fun trip, but when one or more parties forgets their place and ventures into traffic, accidents will happen and people will get hurt!

For all those ladies that I am dating or may date in the future, if you can’t maintain your lane, please don’t drive on my freeway!